Ingrained in my mind like the ink that stains my skin,
The wretched beauty of the world mocks me again
For where there is beauty there is also the beast
The raging madness of the whirlpool within...
Plagued with the ironies that gnaw me forever more
The unanswered questions, the fables and the lore,
Lure me into the habit of pondering each day,
Could life be mapped out? Can answers find a way?
If life were indeed like a game of dice,
Are we all just winners or losers wading through strife?
Or is there more to be seen, less to be told,
If only I could answer these questions once more
Clarity evades me as I tease my mind,
With a thousand scenarios building in my head
Probability and permutations fail to see,
The additions of human error come what may-
And yet the logic of an illogical world is nothing but cold comfort,
To a restless heart and a bruised soul,
Who wants the meaning in entirety and not snatches of the whole
There has to be meaning, there has to be a way,
To explain everything that plagues my mind today...
Let me finish the jigsaw to the puzzle that never ends,
But then again do I really know life? Why pretend?
Was I better off a fool with the world at my feet?
Or as a mortal who sees no limits to the endless road
I wish I knew what eats us inside?
How society's unfathomable ways make us blind,
And yet with my eyes half open the picture proves too much for me to bear
There is only so much I can take, so much I can care
Could it possibly be the reason why we lack so much love, so much empathy?
That our heart can't take the realities?
Yes, Maybe its wiser to just live as we do-
Unfazed, unashamed, cold as glass, black as tar
There is no joy in reality, or comfort in a heartsick soul
Why should we ever even try to be complete or whole?